横浜英才英語教室 What the...(02)
Pizzo's Anti Hijacking System for Aircraft.
This is hilariously one of the best things I have read about in a long while.
Imagine being a hijacker (I know you aren't) and you make your way up to the pilot's cabin. You go to force your way in using a prybar made from acrylic that you snuck past security (probably not going to work, but if you're dumb enough to try to hijack a plane, you probably haven't thought that far ahead), only to have a heavy door to slam behind you from above. It's a trap! You look for a way out, but it is four smooth walls around you. Then the floor disappears. You are dropped into a mesh bag that cinches shut at the top due to your weight pulling the mesh down and pulling the drawstrings tight. Not to worry, you still have the serrated plastic knife they gave you to cut your in flight chicken. But alas! The mesh is made of kevlar! However, you're no quitter, you keep at it, fraying almost two millimeters of the net in your bid for escape. Then you hear a sound that makes your heart sink.
The rushing of air below you grows louder as the the floor below your new home opens up and you see clouds rushing below you. Clouds!? They installed bomb bay doors in a commercial airliner?! Yes they did. 'They wouldn't.' you think to yourself. They would. You hear a click above you and then you are momentarily weightless. It seems like a dream, you no longer hear anything as cold air whips around you and the plane gets smaller as you fall. Right when you think it's all over, your whole body gets pressed into the mesh so hard that it leaves cross hatched bruises all over your back. A parachute! You're saved! Cold, but safe! As you near the ground you hear sirens and turn to look down and see red, white, and blue flashing lights. How did the cops know you were going to land there? A radio signal was sent the moment you were excreted from the airplane that gave an approximate location of your landing. Then you think, 'Man, its good I did this on the Miami to Detroit flight and not the San Fran to Honolulu flight.